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TopRETHINKING IDEAS THAT CAME FROM AN ABUSER
"Ideation" refers to the concepts, ideas, or images that someone has about something. It refers to how someone thinks about something. "Religious ideation" then refers to the way someone thinks about God, religion, and the relationship with God. It focuses more on the thinking rather than the feeling.
I believe that abusers often involve religious ideation in the abuse.
First, they may claim a distorted religious reason for the abuse. ("Spare the rod and spoil the child.")
Second, they may project a reason for the abuse upon the victim. ("She deserves it because she is evil.")
Third, they may use religious language to help maintain secrecy. ("You must honor your father and mother. God will condemn you to Hell if you break that Commandment by talking.") All three may be reported by the same patient.
The statements made by an abuser may reflect an emotional illness that is present. They may be stated also by a larger community. They may simply be an attempt by the abuser to justify the abuse. It is also possible that the abuser never in any way believed what he was saying, that he was just looking for a way to help control the child and keep the secret of the abuse from getting out.
At times the views stated by an abuser are bizarre and extreme distortions of the theology of a major denomination or Church. At times they are fairly accurate reflections of the extreme views of a sect or cult. They may even reflect the views of a group that directly makes a commitment to evil or encourages the intentional abuse of children. (I admit that I would discourage direct involvement in that kind of group, just as I would discourage serious acts of self-harm.)
Often someone who has survived abuse has been in a lifelong struggle to sort out the religious ideation to which they were exposed. When someone is in a treatment process, I think that the struggle is an important part of that process, but there may not be too much help available. Leaving someone to figure it out on their own may slow down the healing.
I think that sometimes people have sought out help, and with great courage have tried to ask questions about religion. Sometimes the questions may have appeared so unusual that the person they asked didn’t think they were serious, or thought they were asking something else, or was uncomfortable with the question and suggested that the person "shut up." Not really helpful.
I will honor and respect any question. I will do my best to respond to it. If I misunderstand what’s being asked, please try again.
© Fr J Mahoney